The man is obliged to spend on his wife, but the opposite is not true.
The Muslim woman is not obliged to serve her husband`s family.
As for the woman (asking) her husband's permission to visit her parents, that is part of good companionship and it is natural to seek permission from the one who is responsible for the safety, welfare and well-being of the household. However, the husband is not permitted to prevent her from visiting her kin, nor can he prevent her first degree relatives from visiting her unless there is a reasonably verifiable harm from such visits.
As for the sexual needs of the man and woman, it is quite natural that the emphasis was placed on forbidding women from rejecting their husband`s request to have sex.
As for punishments, women are fully entitled to exhorting their husbands and reminding them of Allah with all assertiveness appropriate for a woman.